elleflies: (Military: Tank Sign)
Going Over There...

Normally when I do the Dallas - Leipzig flights the entire plane enters a coma and 240 soldiers drift off into sleepy oblivion. Not so with my last flight. I have never seen a group so awake.

Granted, the picture above is from a flight a few years ago, but the goofing off and giggling was the same as the flight today.
Here's a taste of my last flight:

7 Flight Attendants

3 Pilots

8 U.S. Army Escorts

68 Afghani Nationals from the Afghani Police and Afghani Army.

108 82nd Airborne Troops (U.S. Army)

Put in a plane together. Mix well and throughly.

More details are forthcoming once I recover from it all.
Please stow all weapons...

Most airlines deal with bags, my biggest source of grief is the weapons. They must be stowed with the butt to the aisle and the barrel to the wall, no weapons including rifles, handguns or knives may be placed in the overhead bins (although considering the amount of knives some of these guys have I'm sure a few sneak by us in their luggage). It sounds simple enough but you wouldn't believe how difficult some soldiers find these little rules...

Also, a few things for your listening enjoyment:

The Marines got a huge kick out of Shirley Q. Liquors pre-flight briefing even though no amount of begging on my part or on theirs could entice my purser to play it over the PA. So instead I offer it to you:

Shirley Q. Liquors Pre-flight Briefing for Ebonics Airways

And The Rage Against the Machine version of the Imperial March from Star Wars. We were stuck on the ground for waaay too long in JFK (almost 8 hours) so some of the Marine officers and I pulled out our Ipods and started comparing music. The Imperial March was a big hit.

Take and Enjoy.
Holy Crap! I have a date in Pittsburgh with Mr Awesome (otherwise known as thecutesoldierboy) He's home on R&R and I'm flying out to Pittsburgh on Wednesday to see him before he heads back to the wilds of Afghanistan.


I should also explain the SeXO comment from my last (barely understandable post). You see, there are many many handsome men that trek through our planes, but few of them are so smoking hot that your brain disengages and all you can think is: "oh sweet je-bus here are my panties"

The XO (commanding officer) of our last flight was in the "here are my panties, meet me in the galley" category of men. He was... Just... *grabby hands* Sadly, he said nothing, I chattered along happily to the other officers and he just sat there. Hell, I even planted my ass on the arm rest of his seat and proceeded to have a long conversation with the officer next to him and he still said nothing - not even a polite "please move." It was sad and noneveryoumind that I was slightly intimidated by all the beauty and sheer masculinity laid out before me.

Somehow I managed to pull myself away from the front of the plane and the pretty inhabiting it and ended up in the back chatting with the grunts and telling them about how one of their Sargent's had spent far too much time analyzing my high heels and telling me how weird they looked. It was okay, he hadn't been around women's shoes for over a year, we forgave him for his shoe critiquing ways. Although that didn't stop me from telling the story to the guys in the back, when they asked who this shoe connoisseur was I had no idea. When they asked if he was handsome I replied with "no, it's not your XO"

This sent them into a flurry of (manly) giggles. Apparently the troops were well aware of their XO's staggering male beauty and jokingly referred to him as the seXO behind his back. And thus, he became the SeXO to us too, many a flight attendant found themselves standing in the forward galley gazing raptly as his strong jaw and broad chiseled chest and thick dark hair. mmmmmmm just. so. pretty.

But yes, that's the SeXO and I shall cherish the memories of that flight (and the pretty!) for some time.
I am shallow. Not all the time, but I have my moments. Stick me in a tin can full of soldiers and leave me there for 9 hours at 35,000 feet and you betcha I'm going to be checking them out.

Most are quite easy on the eyes. Some are so smoking hot it's all I can do to tear my eyes away and choke out "chicken or pasta?"

It was all to easy to do on my last trip. Half the crew was male, and good portion of that half way gay, so if it wasn't me spotting the hotties, it was one of my overeager crew members pulling me aside and telling me in hushed whispers to go by 25 F or whatever seat of the moment happened to contain their little piece of eye candy. Not that I minded of course...

But there are times that I can't help but marvel that they pay me to do this. And there are times when I meet soldiers like Pablo.

Pablo is a doll of a soldier: square jaw, deep brown eyes, short blond hair, all kinds of muscles. A real GI Joe type of guy. He's got 14 buddies that sing his praises at every turn: all I heard was "Pablo this" and "Pablo that". If the war in Iraq were to be won by an one soldier, it would be Pablo, or so his buddies say. He's an in your face, scarred up, tattooed, flaunt the rules and kick some ass kind of guy. His rifle is never far from hand and he prefers scuffed up white tennis shoes to sand colored boots. He gets away with it too.

He had his pictures taken with the female flight attendants and in group shots, he's always got one of us girls hanging onto him whilst the rest of his buddies grin happily behind him. Pablo never grins. He stays stern in the knowledge that he is the man. And he even dropped trou to prove it, or more specifically, his buddies dropped his trou to prove it.

I mentioned he was a doll of a soldier right? )

And my god, has it really been three weeks since I posted? Yikes.
Happy Fourth of July Y'all!

I hope everyone is enjoying their day and that there's much beer and burgers and fireworks. I'm skipping the festivities this year in favor of bringing a bunch of boys home for two weeks rest and relaxation after six months tooling around Iraq.

I can't think of a better way to spend my day.

Photo Sharing and Video Hosting at Photobucket

As evidenced from above, they can get a little loopy sometimes, but this is the joy of troop transport. It's always a joy and a pleasure to start the trip back to the west knowing that everyone is whole and healthy and looking forward to spending time with their family.

Bringing them east is a completely different feeling and one I'm happy to skip on this trip. The picture above was taken during a troop deployment to Afghanistan - hence all the weapons and the loopiness. There's a fair amount of psyching up that has to be done for those trips, from the guys going over there but I'd also say from the people bringing them over too. I stand in the plane and tell them 'thank you' and 'be safe' and my heart is in my throat because I want every single one of them to be on the plane back home where I can say 'thank you' and 'welcome home'

Welcome Home is my favorite phrase to say during Troop Transports.

So in all the festivities and the shenanigans and the drinking, raise a beer high and think of the troops.



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